Chaos Theory won’t explain the fact that two of my three Best of L.A. entries for Los Angeles Magazine this year take place at Rockwell Table and Stage. Well, maybe it does. Honestly, Ian Malcolm didn’t give the most coherent lecture on the subject. Or he did, but the fact that Jeff Goldblum’s flirt switch is forever stuck in the “on” position obscured the lesson. But goddamn if that isn’t the beauty of The ‘Blum, one of the rare grown American men in this world who can make anyone he meets feel, um, desired without coming across as an, ah, total creep. But that’s an essay for another day. Here, I’ve written about the best Celeb-Fronted Music Residency, which, yes, goes to Goldblum at Rockwell; the best Live Musical Parodies of Movies, which, yes, goes to the UMPO crew at Rockwell; and the best Guided Urban Historical Hike (which goes to the fantastic L.A. native, historian, and journalist Charles Fleming). So, ah, go, um, read about it.